When You Realize You're Becoming Your Parent

It always starts with something small.

You’re in the middle of a sentence and suddenly hear yourself say a phrase straight out of your childhood.

Maybe it’s:“Because I said so.”

Or “Do you think money grows on trees?”

Or “In this house, we…”And it hits you like a brick:

Oh no. I’ve become my parent.

It’s funny. Until it’s not.

Because sometimes, it’s more than just borrowed phrases—it’s tone. It’s posture. It’s the way your voice sharpens when you’re stressed, or how you instinctively react to something your kid does before your brain has a chance to weigh in.

For some of us, that realization is nostalgic. But for others, it’s complicated. Maybe you swore you’d never repeat those patterns. Maybe you're still healing from them. And now you're staring at your reflection in a moment that feels eerily familiar—and a little unsettling.

Here’s the truth: we all carry pieces of where we came from. Some good. Some harmful. Some we never noticed until we were the ones standing in the doorway, telling someone smaller than us to “clean their room before dinner.”

But becoming a parent doesn’t mean you’re doomed to repeat everything.

Real growth happens when you notice the pattern, pause, and choose differently.

It’s saying, “Okay, I sounded like them… but I can still course-correct.”

It’s reflecting without spiraling. It’s forgiving your past and yourself.

Because the goal isn’t to be perfect. It’s to be present. To be aware. To take what was useful from your upbringing and leave the rest behind.

And hey, even if you do end up using the phrase “I brought you into this world and I can take you out”—at least now you’re self-aware enough to cringe while you say it.